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Not-So-Famous Last Words

August 2, 2011

I don’t really make a habit of walking through cemeteries and reading gravestones, but if you’re going to do it, wouldn’t you like to see a couple of funny ones? So here’s a list of not-so-famous epitaphs and last known words. Try to look past the macabre and just enjoy the laugh. 🙂

Last Words

  • “If you’re going to text me, do it right. The correct grammar is ‘The runaway elephant’s coming your way’ not ‘the runaway elephants coming you’re way.'”
  •  “Ok, now I’m going to stand in the middle of the street and take a picture of you looking the wrong way in front of the ‘look left’ sign.”
  • “I don’t know why they say you can’t use a blow dryer while you’re still in the tub, it’s working just fine.”
  • “So I figure the best way to track down the runaway lion is to cover myself in raw steak. I’m sure to find him.”
  • “The trick to juggling chain saws is to never get distra–hey look, a penny!”
  • “If you’re going to keep holding that golf club in this storm, at least come stand over here under this tree.”
Epitaphs
  • “He made me buy the expensive headstone, but he didn’t make me promise what I’d write on it.”
  • “Funerals are expensive. Do your family a favor and die at sea.”
  • “Ha ha, I’m the only one who knew the password to the safe.”
  • “If you’re here because of the will, just go ahead and spit on me now.”
  • “Can’t find the remote, eh? Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha.”
  • “Come closer…. closer… Ha ha, made you look.”
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One Comment leave one →
  1. August 3, 2011 1:05 am

    These were good. The password to the safe really made me chuckle.

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